Last night woke me up to some brand new realizations that would have come in handy more sooner than later. My BFF/roomie and I decided to go out to Prior Lake and visit our friend for her birthday. I have to admit, at first I was a little nervous going all the way out there with no real plan on how to get back after I got my vodka fix for the night. Once we got to the bar and the vodski started flowing through my veins I began to realize I could care less about how I would be venturing home at the end of the evening. I also realized a few other things that hopefully will stick in my memory for a while:
1. When you are drunk you start believing that everyone in the bar knows you and you have shared many memories together.
2. People don’t like to be called “dago cunts”- even if they aren’t Italian.
3. Honda Civics can pose as a bed until you are sober enough to communicate with other humans and find yourself a way to get home.
4. Shamwow’s make terrible blankets.
5. Bar owners will hire you for the summer if you buy them shots.
6. My roommate and I are more times than none “those people” at the bar.
7. It’s apparently easy to drink $90 worth of vodka in 2 hours.
8. $90 can buy you a lot of vodka.
